(From the Nar-Anon Blue Booklet: 2014 Revision)

Our role as helper is not to do things for those we are helping, but to be things, not to try to
train and change their actions, but to train and change our reactions. We can change our
negatives to positives:

  • Fear to faith.
  • Contempt for what they do to respect for the potential within them.
  • Rejection to release with love.
  • Not try to make them fit a standard or image, nor expect them to measure up to or down from that standard, but give them an opportunity to develop the best within them,
    regardless of what that best may be.
  • Dominance to encouragement.
  • Panic to serenity.
  • False hope, self-centered, to real hope, God-centered.
  • The rebellion of despair to the energy of personal revolution.
  • Driving to guidance.
  • Self-justification to self-understanding.

As we change in such ways as these, we change the world about us and all the people in the world for the better.